THANKSGIVING EDITION
Welcome to a day designed to give thanks for… something. Everyone’s list should be different. You know the mountains you’ve climbed, the dangers you’ve faced, and the audacious ridiculousness you’ve had to endure. Some of you trot through today, others wobble, and me, I’m going to sleep. We did our turkey yesterday. I cooked all f’n day by myself. The results?
If you’re having trouble finding something for which to be thankful, let me make a few suggestions:
- You woke up
- I woke up
- The food you eat today probably won’t kill you immediately
- You didn’t have to broker a cease-fire to make it to today’s dinner
- You’re not marching through Manhattan in the rain being chased by a massive balloon
- There’s not a cat in your shower
- You live in the same universe as ME
And now that we’re done with the whole turkey thing, you know what comes next? Let me give you a couple of hints.
TAKE THE FUCKING HINT!
MY BIRTHDAY IS SUNDAY!
I have expectations. Don’t disappoint me.