WE ARE DONE (for now)!

NO MORE CHEMO! Yesterday was officially my last dose. While I still have a table full of other meds I’ll still have to take, the daily poisoning that I’ve endured for the past two-plus years is over! I want to give a HUGE THANK YOU to Kat and everyone else who has endured and put up with me over this less-than-fun journey. This is a trip that I do not care to repeat, ever, though that is, in reality, highly unlikely. Still, my oncology team is convinced that my numbers have been good enough for long enough that we can consider my leukemia to be in remission! PARTY TIME!
Well, okay, maybe hold up on that party thing a little bit. The doctor was careful to explain that being in remission doesn’t mean I immediately stop showing symptoms. Doing daily chemo for over two years means I have a lot of the drug in my body. The poison isn’t going to suddenly go away just because I stop adding to it. Recovery from the drug could take just as long as the chemo did, and there are some symptoms, such as chronic fatigue, that may never go completely away.
One of the things the doctor warned about was symptoms seeming to disappear for a while and then suddenly returning without any warning. While nausea and night sweats are the symptoms most likely to reappear, he warned that I should always keep my cane handy because there’s no way of knowing when my muscles might decide to shut down and stop working. He said the symptoms can also mimic a cold or the flu. Should such symptoms reappear, he requested that I call the cancer center before calling my GP to consider whether what I’m experiencing might be a leftover from the chemo.
What does ‘being in remission’ mean if I’m still going to be just as sick? Let’s start here:

The doctor emphasized that there is no way to be absolutely sure that CLL is in complete remission. There is a test that can be done with a bone marrow sample, but it is still considered highly experimental as no one is quite sure what to do with the results. As a result, he recommended against the rather painful procedure. Instead, I’ll do quarterly check-ins with the nurse practitioner, and as long as those pesky numbers don’t start to climb again, we’ll assume that the remission is holding.
There’s also no way to accurately predict how long the remission might hold. Five years is pretty much the max for most people, but there’s always the chance it could be as little as six months. His recommendation was pretty standard: get plenty of rest, eat well, exercise when I can, and avoid any serious stress. Apparently, the doctor hasn’t been reading a lot of news lately.
In the meantime, I have a fine needle biopsy of a nodule on my left thyroid this morning. My anxiety wishes that Kat could be there with me, but she has other things to do and, by any means of accounting, this is a rather low-risk procedure. I just have to stay completely still.
HAVE YOU MET ME?
I don’t think I’ve ever stayed completely still for anything! A local anesthetic will be used, and then they carefully poke a needle into my neck. I can’t imagine anything going wrong there, can you? I’m told the whole thing shouldn’t take more than two hours, and then I can come back home and sleep off the anesthetic.
Having a nodule is not necessarily indicative of yet more cancer. Should the biopsy come back positive, thyroid cancer is typically handled by an endocrinologist, not an oncologist. Same building, different floor, different doctor. The nodule has sat there untreated for the past two years, though, so chances lean more toward it being benign.
Where do I go from here? Assuming the whole thyroid thing is a nonissue, I have an appointment with the neurologist that may be rather involved. There could be a surgery or two involved there. I’ll need to see a urologist again, and there could be a surgery involved there as well. I still need to be in an assisted living facility, but as Medicare/Medicaid budgets get tossed around, who knows when that might happen?
A part of me wants to get back to work taking pictures again. I would have to make a lot of adjustments, though. I need to be able to sit down more often than standing. Indoors is better than outdoors. No extreme weather in any direction. No chasing breaking news stories. For that matter, probably no chasing static news stories. Still, I feel like the photo ideas have just been piling up for the past three years. I want a camera in my hand again.
For now, we’ll just worry about this whole FNA thing, get through it, then chill for the weekend. I’m sure next week will bring a whole new set of problems. There’s never any shortage.
So, who’s down to party?
Wednesday, February 5, 2025
Life In The Stupid Lane.
The shock on the faces of White House Chief of Staff Suzie Wiles and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu let everyone know: Felonious Punk did not discuss the takeover of Gaza before opening his mouth. Everyone in the room was shocked. Allies and adversaries both quickly rejected the idea like they did the first time Punk made the suggestion. For Palestinian people, however, his statement has a horrible sense of deja vu. It was a mass expulsion in 1948 that created the Jewish-dominated country of Israel. The move was wrong then, and it’s just as wrong now. But then, right and wrong don’t seem to matter to this administration.
In a move that surprises no one, the administration pulled almost all USAID workers off the job worldwide. Aid for Palestinian refugees was completely eliminated. Funding for the mission attempting to reign in Haiti’s gangs has been zeroed out. The net effect is likely to be a higher level of global chaos as competing anti-government groups worldwide ramp up acts of terror in an attempt to gain control. The solution that Felonious Punk is likely to propose is that the US simply take over all the problem areas.
All of them. Forcefully if necessary. The international community is worried. Some say such moves violate international law, and they’re probably correct. But then, many of the administration’s domestic moves are illegal as well but that’s not stopping them. We are being governed by a group of self-serving billionaire thugs. Nothing is going to get better until we find an effective way to fight back.
One of the most stupid moves made in the past twenty-four hours was essentially firing almost everyone in the CIA. Technically, the entire staff was offered contract buyouts. Either way, the results are the same: we lose our eyes and ears around the world. Assets that have prevented untold disasters will be gone. There will be no one protecting US interests, nor the rule of law, anywhere in the world. Who benefits? Terrorists. Without the CIA on the ground, there’s damn near no one left to stop them. We are likely to be attacked both at home and abroad. We are inherently weaker now than we were yesterday.
Don’t think all this isn’t going to affect folks at home as well. Several Head Start preschools may need to close temporarily because they’ve been locked out of their federal funding. Good luck finding someone to watch the kids while you go to work, parents! And those of you who regularly shop Temu and/or Shein will want to know that the US Postal Service suspended inbound parcels from China and Hong Kong. It doesn’t matter that you’ve already paid for the goods. They’re now stuck for an unknown period of time, perhaps permanently. The same is likely to apply for some purchases made on Amazon if the origin point is either China or Hong Kong. Fast fashion, laptops and toys are likely to cost more due to US tariffs on Chinese imports. These are the things that are going to hit your pocketbook now.
What are we going to do? Yeah, I know protests are planned for today in all 50 states. They are occurring in every state’s capitol at noon, local times. I had planned on attending the one here, but I’ll be sitting in my oncologist’s office instead. Freezing rain forecast for much of the Midwest is likely to dampen attendence numbers as well. Protests are nice and all, but when faced with a person who brazenly defies laws, are protests enough? We’ve seen politicians stand in front of microphones, but none of them are having any success actually stopping any of Punk’s actions. We need a forceful plan that hits back at the administration with all the fear and furry they’ve put on us the past two weeks.
I have my moments of doubt. As G was getting ready for school this morning, I had him double check to make sure he had his house key with him. While I should be back from the doctor before he gets home, there are no guarantees even for the simple things anymore. G and I had an interesting conversation about the advantages of attending both trade school and college, given the uncertainty of the future. He’s thinking in the right direction, but part of me wonders if there’s any amount of education in any field that is going to adequately prepapre our kids for the future being dumped on them. Both will, presumably, graduate high school before the next presidential election. I don’t know how to advise them anymore. I can’t promise them anything will be left. I can’t guarantee that options available today will still be available when they graduate. Nothing is certain.
As much as I’d love to have grandchildren, I’d hate to encourage anyone to bring a child into this mess. A dear friend recently had a beautiful baby girl and I know that she’ll do everything within her power to protect that child and raise her well, but what options will she have? Will education still exist in the forms with which we are accustomed? Will appropriate pediatric medical care be available and affordable during her formative years? Could food and clothing be a challenge? This isn’t a first-time mom. She has resources. She knows what she’s doing. Still, raising this child could be dramatically different from her older siblings.
With all the different rumors and arguments I’m seeing and hearing, I have little hope for anyone forming a ‘well regulated militia’ capable of fighting back against the government with any real force. In fact, that line in the Second Amendment is practically useless in our current situation.
No matter what, we must resist.
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